The above post has been added purely for entertainment purposes. Absolutely no offence is intended to the author and no animals were harmed in the making of this nonsense.

I regret to inform you that you have been eliminated from further contention as Mr Right.

As you are aware, the competition criteria was exceedingly difficult and many well-qualified candidates such as yourself also failed to make the final cut.

In order that you may find better success in your future romantic endeavours, please allow…[Read more]

At first he was disgusted, until he realised that his surroundings was thawing him out. He started crying out for joy as the ice…[Read more]

He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom. While he’s in there, the husband tells his…[Read more]

And I told you to be patient
and I told you to be fine
and I told you to be balanced
and I told you to be kind

And in the morning when I’m with you
but it will be a different kind
I’ll be holding all the…[Read more]

CP just make sure no huntmans hitch hike in your suitcase :shock:

urghhhhhhhhh

@pasty wrote:

Modern medicine has alot to answer for! :D

Eh? You got me on that one.

:?

That Pasty is proper mental Momentary :shock:

Because blonde men would have to think them up.

She’s the one throwing bread at the airplanes.

Unconditional. – Eros

Nothing spoils the taste of peanut butter like unrequited love. – Charlie Brown

It’s an electric blanket with somebody else in control of the switch. – Cathy Carlyle

Love is a grave mental disorder. – Plato

You can’t put a price tag on love, but…[Read more]

@Irish_Lucy wrote:

nope I look good from all angles.

Im the one in the green – now control yourself lads, go easy on the pm’s please.

Mmm, do those rolls come already buttered?

Lmfao

If someone knows how to drive you cra…[Read more]

Now you do the same…

Here’s mine –

The soles well worn…

From front to back,

One size fits all,

Only colour is black,

The leathers aged…

and see that crack?

That’s paranoid anti-social disorder…

WHAT

you want your shoes back?

I like shoes.
They’re really cute
Nice with jeans
or with a suit.

Shoes with dresses,
skirts and sweaters,
I don’t see how it
gets much betters.

Sneakers, flip-flops,
boots, and pumps
make me sing
(but not “My Humps”).

I’d like to buy
some Choo or Prada
but even Payless
is better than nada.

This is long
but in conclusio…[Read more]

The shop was closed. Or you had doubts.
The sort that minds like ours dream up incessantly
You thought I might not want your flowers

It made me smile and hug you then.
Now I can only smile
Cos look, the flowers you nea…[Read more]

Don’t tell me that this is just a test
For I am truly blessed
Don’t tell me that I am chosen
Apart from all the rest.

Don’t come at me with answers
That can only come from me
Don’t tell me how my grief will pass
That I w…[Read more]

I, as sinned against as sinning, take small pleasure from the winning of our decades-long guerrilla war. For from my job I’ve wanted more than victory over one who’d tried to punish me before they died, and now, neither of us dead, we haunt these halls in constant dread of drifting past the others life while long-term mem…[Read more]

But perhaps, as you write by your window
On a day of tender spring
You will stop your work for a moment
To hear a blackbird sing
And…[Read more]

Chatters in supermarkets. Sod off!!!!

Women who collect every voucher from every rubbish magazine and then proceed to redeem the lot when i’m behind them in the queue! Not funny!!!

Lmao!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57kIDslOMmU&feature=related

I dedicate this to Lucy&Deli, the 2 best lesbo’s in f2. And there is 2 women in this video playing drums at the start that remind me of you’s both :D.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MRFybeuLh54&ob=av2n

Merry Xmas :twisted:

Drummers are scarey dear but I like it :D

Here’s yours…[Read more]