10 June, 2015 at 8:27 pm #20302
Do you do things just for you!
not often enough would be my guess.
tonight i was asked to give a talk on self respect and esteem and confidence building.
the gasps that went round the hall when i said…… whatever you decide to do, do it for YOU no one else, whether its a change of image, or style, weight loss or gain, or giving up a bad habit ….. unless you do it for yourself you will never suceed.
can remember when i was working, giving talks and lectures to previously abused people, and id do a kind of quiz.
id ask them to write down 3 important things they would do in preparation for a very special guest coming to stay.
i had replies of……. clean the house, prepare a fab meal, buy flowers.
what i said next shocked them again. so do one of those once a week for yourself. because you are special, you’re your own guest, and youre worth it.
so what do you do for yourselves? that makes you feel special to YOU. because no one else matters, its just you who sees you and should love you.11 June, 2015 at 8:20 am #525649
every week i buy myself new cloths, nothing special but now my wardrobe is overflowing.
Also have recently be buying house plants for myself, mainly cactus as their hardy plants and you want to be really bad to kill a cactus. Currently have 3 succulents and 10 cactus’s.11 June, 2015 at 10:05 am #525650
Women in general I find always sacrifice their own time, money and freedom for the family…..I guess its a motherly thing to do, natural instincts to “feed” smaller mouths before ourselves….
Kids soon grow up…..and for whatever reasons our lives as we get older can dramatically change…
I have found that over the past years..maybe 5 years or so I definitely do things for me, things that make me happy…I am not going to go into detail as to what they are…..but women should not feel guilty about doing things for themselves11 June, 2015 at 12:58 pm #525651
i always have fresh flowers in every room. for me. i love flowers.
although recently theyre competing with my orchid plants, because theyre coming back into flower.
I always make sure that i cook myself a proper meal at least once a day, make sure the table looks nice etc. i may be alone but i still have me and we need to be grateful to ourselves for keeping us going.
i think youre right kenty we do give instinctively but forget ourselves. men do too. they work as well as women, and feel they need to provide for their family.
i think many humans undervalue themselves.11 June, 2015 at 3:42 pm #525652
a very pleasant thread…11 June, 2015 at 5:58 pm #525653
Most parents sacrifice things when bringing up children as I did but now my son has flown the nest and has his own life I refuse to feel guilty about the small pleasures I afford myself.
I work hard for the money to pay for the leccy that fills my bath up with boiling hot water and have it full of luxurious bubbles and if I want to pay stupid money for a Michelin star meal out I feel no guilt in fact I revel in it!
Gone are the days of guilt for me, I’m old now and I intend to enjoy whatever time is left as much as I can.11 June, 2015 at 11:18 pm #525654
great post LD,and before anybody says oh cose thought you hated guides mr hypocritical
I do yeh,but rose is a breed apart I love her id marry her
she can do no wrong to my eyes
hmm why am I fond of rose?
I tell you why she is our boss on these here boards,she don’t say much,shes sh!t at picnics
but she walks quietly but carries a big stick
lubs ya rosie xx12 June, 2015 at 5:41 am #525655
Great thread Laine, reminded me of a quote by Morris Adler : “We visit others as a matter of social obligation. How long has it been since we have visited with ourselves ?”12 June, 2015 at 8:10 am #52565612 June, 2015 at 9:16 am #525657
very buddhist of you Mech.( dont know Morris Adler) but that is the buddhist view.
but it is true, we rarely think of ourselves.
just to still the mind and feel the breath of life filling our bodies.
i set aside time once a week to overhaul me, my feelings, my hurts and come out positive afterwards. but then im lucky being retired i have the time now to do it, i’m no longer a human doing but a human being.
long hard look at the inner self can work wonders for negativity.