A HOT bed of gossip

How were our chatters coping with the hot weather in JC land….fat bottoms stuck to plastic chairs.
The unmistakable smell of stale sweat from chatters too scared to take a break and shower incase they should miss some gossip……

Taint_heart_won_notsofair_lady glanced at his Timex,

” damn it, nearly 4 pm, I hope Princess Kenty comes in soon”.

Princess Kenty, had been watching the room under the name of Chameleon,

a name she had used in the past on the boards to threaten herself, thus getting

lots of sympathy from Thick_Slice, he was’nt called Thick for nothing.

For princess Kenty, any press was good press,

however, now she no longer had the papershop it was more tricky , she couldn’t use 2 different PC’s.

Deciding to put Taint out of his misery, Princess Kenty swept into the room, mwahhhh’ing all

the men and some of the women ( wink ).

” ive just had to pay the decorators fgs, £18,ooo for 2 rooms !!! still it had to be done.”

ManTan Tracy shouted ” fek orrff ya bragging cow ”

Princess Kenty smiled and said ” anyway i’m not staying, ”

she picked her nose and wiped a bogie on her faded, purple, velour tracksuit, with sweatrings under the arms.

” Ive got to sort out my holiday to Cape Verdi…..have I mentioned I’m going to Cape Verdi?”

” only 6 times this week so far, and its only Monday ” mumbled ManTan Tracy.

Taint Heart fearing he was going to be ignored said ” you are so classy kenty….”

and he wiped his sweaty pits on a nearbye tea towel.

Just then His alarm clock went off , damn it ! 5 o clock already !!!

The mrs would be leaving work now and he had to put the oven chips in and open the tin of beans.

” right i’m offski…. bye all mwahhhhhhh” Princess kenty flounced off, ‘The Chase’ was coming
on and she fancied a sausage roll.

Taint Heart surreptitiously wandered over and gave kentys chair a quick lick….

” work calls” said Taint heart,

” i must go and do my glamorous job here in glamorous Cyprus, where I live, glamorously,

even though i sit in a chatroom all day 8-5, looking glamorous.. anyway bye xxx”

He rushed round the flat, spraying air freshener and turned the PC off,

with a bit of luck the Mrs may go to Bingo at the weekend and he could pop in Jc Again.

Jade_The_Blade yelled at an unknown person ” fooook offff you boring twot”

Filterchat sighed and muttered ” what a woman” ….

Everyone else was used to it so said nothing.

Huge(door)knob and Ugly_as_a_moose were swapping meaningful and very deep song lyrics.

Huge whipped out his banjo and sang
”Maybe you’re strong, but you don’t stand a chance
Feel the power of a warrior! FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT”

”BOOM”

”COWARDS !! ”

Ugly_as_a_moose whipped out her teeth and sang
”And beneath the blazing sun
They stood there face to face and Ted went for his bun,
But Ernie was to quick
Things didn’t go the way Ted planned
And a strawberry flavoured youghurt
Sent it spinning from his hand ”

”BOOM”

”CARROTS !!”

TaffyTuckshop entered the room and announced that her ‘not so private’ meeting with Blue-veiny-nose was off !!

” I came in yesterday ” she hollared ”and the bastid said ‘ hi thee owt na cannee owt tha och

aye ant twek na och fa hist in !!!’ I’ve no idea what it means, but I’m right off Scottish men.

Oooo Heya Welshman, can I stroke your leek ? ”

Chatguide Nipple_Stiffener rolled her eyes and played with her God button…

on…off….on….off

and she smiled wickedly.

Nice_Pies_Female put her Rabbit away, and flopped, tiredly on her beanbag, flashing vast

quantities of sturdy gusset, which set Woodie’s ‘wood’ off and he sloshed some port on his

best silk cravat, which was’nt tied round his neck.

well it was very hot !!!!

Rosepedalbin lay on her sofa, wafting herself with an old Scholl, she was now regretting

letting Joker become her new counselor…

Joker:” tell me what’s troubling you my dear lass ….. you look a little under the weather …

how can i help you ? Lass. Tell Grandad Joker all about it…Lass”

RosePedalbin: ” I’m…I’m having trouble … ( gasp ) …”

Joker: ”yes ? what is it Lass?”

RosePedalbin: ” trouble ( gasp ) … breathing….”

Joker: ” oh should I loosen your clothing Lass… you are looking a little green round the gills Lass ”

RosePedalbin : ” Nooooooooo…… ( gasp )…. but , for the love of God, ( gasp ) could you

possibly brush your tooth ? ”