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ill pass on the voddy,,,,
Rubes no workin this sat, goin oot with Mr Wolfie, his Mother n Sister n Nephew for a meal sat nite as his sis’s bday,,,,
these id like lol
join in folks…. mind its Mill-Guy…. there’s that posh c un t fae Mill-guy…
The Glaswegian Rhapsody
(sung to Queen – Bohemian Rhapsody)
Is this the real life, is it the methadone?
Stuck in the Gorbals, two bob fur the telephone?
Open yer wine an’ talk wi’ a whine like meeeee…
Am just a weegie, gie us yer Sunny D.
Cos I’ll chib yer pal, rip yer Da;
Slash yer dug, r1de yer Maw!
Any way the Clyde flows,
Disnae really metter tae me… tae meeeee…Haw Maw, just chibbed some bam,
Buckie bottle tae the heid,
Noo the f*’ b*stard’s deid!
Haw Maw, Um just oan parole,
An noo I’m headin back tae Barlineeeee…
Haw Maw, ooh ooh-ooh ohh,
Never meant tae steal yer purse,
But if I’m no fu’ o’ smack this time the morra’.
Kerry oot, kerry oot!
An we’ll go oot oan the batter!Too late, the bailiff’s here,
Sends shivers doon ma spine,
Gubbed 10 jellies just in time.
Goodbye all ma muckers, I’ve got tae go,
Got tae go and rip some wank fae up the scheme.
Haw Maw, ooh ohh-ooh ooh
I’m such a jakey bam, I sometimes think I’ve never been washed at all…I see a little silhouetto of a bam,
Adidas! Adidas! Can ye get us a kergo?
Thunderbird, White Lightning, very very fright’ning to me!
Twenty Mayfair, (twenty mayfair)
Twenty Mayfair, (twenty mayfair)
Twenty Mayfair and some skins,
Magnifico oh oh oh oh!
I’m just a fat boy, nae body loves me,
He’s just a fat boy fae a fat family!
Spare us a pound fur a wee cup o tea?
Get tae f*, skanky slob, will ye get a job?
For f*, No! I will no’ get a job! – Get a job!
For f*, I will no’ get a job! – Get a job!
For f*, Will you get a job! – Get a job!
Will no’ get a job, get a job!
Will no’ get a job, get a job! No, no, no, no, no, no…
Oh gonorrhea! Gonorrhea!
Gonorrhea and the clap!
Then doon the pub, has the barman put aside for me?
For me, for me, for meeeee!?So you ‘hink you can slash me and p1sh in my eye?
So ye ‘hink ye can chib me an’ leave me to die?
Haw bawbag, can’t dae this tae me bawbag!
Just wait till I’m oot, wait till I’m right oot ma nut!
f* all really matters; any one can see,
f* all really matters, f* all really matters tae me!Another:
Glaswegian pie
sung to american pieA Glaswegian is an inhabitatnt of Glasgow, Scotland, UK
Milngavie is pronounced “Mill-guy”Long long time ago,
I can still remember how
Those weeji bampots made me laugh,
And I know if I had a chance
To see those Neds and Sengas dance,
I’d laugh my f* arse off once again.
‘Cos don’t they realise it’s not clever,
Drinking Buckfast doon the river,
Tucked in trackie bottoms,
They look just f* rotten!
I can’t remember if cried
When I saw these bams in East Kilbride,
But it ammused me deep inside,
The day the mucker thrived!
And they were singin’……..
Bye bye, eatin’ Fray Bentos pie,
Drove the Uno roon’ the toon oh wi’ the techno up high,
Wearing wooly bunnets though it’s nearly July
Singin’, “There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”
“There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”
Did you write the book of shite
“Can I borrow ten bob, gonnae gee’za light?”
Bugger off yer full o’ pish!
Oh and do you belive in hard core techno?
Huv ye gubbed 5 ectos fur a night at the Metro?
A can you teach me how to speak reeeaaallll slow?!
You can tell that she’s in love wi’ him,
‘Cos he’s fae Ibrox and she’s a Tim,
They both kicked off their socks
And those manky old Reeboks.
He was a scrawny youth with a GAP pull over,
A sovvy ring and a stolen Nova,
They fell in love when he muff dove ‘er,
The day the muckers thrived….
And they were singin’……..
Bye bye, eatin’ Fray Bentos pie,
Drove the Uno roon’ the toon oh wi’ the techno up high,
Wearing wooly bunnets though it’s nearly July
Singin’, “There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”
“There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”
Now for ten years you’ve been on the dole,
Hingin’ aboot at the Paisley Toll,
And that’s just how it’s always been.
When the mucker screamed at the Polis van,
In a coat he’d stolen fae TopMan,
And a fag that came from you or me.
But while the cop was looking dapper,
The wee bam chibbed him on the napper,
Dressed all in Kappa clobber,
As he shouted, “suck ma dobber!”.
While wee Tam stole a shirt fae ‘Mark’s’,
And Boab slashed some —- in the park,
They all buzzed petrol in the dark,
The day the Mucker thrived….
And they were singin’……..
Bye bye, eatin’ Fray Bentos pie,
Drove the Uno roon’ the toon oh wi’ the techno up high,
Wearing wooly bunnets though it’s nearly July
Singin’, “There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”
“There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”
Helter Skelter, if the wean cries belt ‘er
Writing mentions on the old bus shelter,
Eight days straight drinking Faaaaaaaaaast!
Doin’ six month for selling smack,
The chip pan diet and the heart attack
A night out at Archaos wi’ the burd.
The Sengas reek of cheap perfume,
While name-tags jangle round the room,
Each one grabs her geezzer,
A fag and lemon Breezer.
The lack of class is hard to hide,
They cannae wait to get inside,
A stair-heid winch and a door-way ride,
That’s how the Muckers thrive
And they were singin’……..
Bye bye, eatin’ Fray Bentos pie,
Drove the Uno roon’ the toon oh wi’ the techno up high,
Wearing wooly bunnets though it’s nearly July
Singin’, “There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”
“There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”
You’ll see them in their usual places,
With silly hats and ugly faces,
Ootside the offy acting hard.
So Shug be nimble, Shug be quick,
And get an ounce of speed on tick
Then cut it up and sell it to yer pals.
All lined up ootside the “Paki’s”,
A rainbow of exotic trackies,
Giein’ abuse tae grannies,
Ya f* up bunch of fannies!
And as the day turns in to night,
The neds may gang up to start a fight,
But on their own they’re soft as shite!
I’ve made a Mucker cry!
And they were singin’……..
Bye bye, eatin’ Fray Bentos pie,
Drove the Uno roon’ the toon oh wi’ the techno up high,
Wearing wooly bunnets though it’s nearly July
Singin’, “There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”
“There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”
(Slowly with feeling)
I met a girl who sang ‘The Sash’
I asked about her pant moustache,
But she just told me to f* off!
I went down to the local chippy,
Where the Neds hung out and the staff were nippy,
And the muckers there harassed me for some fags.
Baseball hats at stupid angles,
The girls each wore three dozen bangles,
Hair done up with scrunchies,
Munching crisps and Crunchies.
But the three meals they enjoy the most,
Are chinky, chippy, beans on toast,
Come Glasgow fair they hit the coast,
The day the mucker thrived
And they were singin’……..
Bye bye, eatin’ Fray Bentos pie,
Drove the Uno roon’ the toon oh wi’ the techno up high,
Wearing wooly bunnets though it’s nearly July
Singin’, “There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”
“There’s that posh wee —- fae Milngavie!”@~*Lucky*~ wrote:
didnt wear any :wink: and it was fab ty lol
ohhhh fab……!!! and a wink… lol rite Lady spill the beans…. who romanced ya bullshyte for their nookie then…??? hooked line n sinker u r lol
lol rite stop it Rubes”’ ur ruinin BB’s thread…!!! lol
lol… i mind the georgie best superstar …. walks like….. Tigger and where’s a bra… bra’s to big… so he’s where’s a wig… that why they call him a sexist pig…
and singin………….. * give me dope MJ… give me dope MJ… give me dope… until the mornin comes…. lol JOKE BTW… i aint a peddler lol aint got none to peddler
lol…. with ur baubles hangin oot as well Sauli lol
lol….. watch it Rubes we’ll be classed as Rasist lol that spelt rite…???
wb Senga x how was the holiday…?? hope u kept ur knickers up lol
@forumhostpb wrote:
@abitofmary_j wrote:
,…. don’t say TT or Soulie or ill wet me pants lol
No change there then Mary eh?????
oi PB i resemble that remark lol …
lol @ Ob’s u got ur leopard pants on then….. as long as ur not spankin the monkey eh lol
