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Early lunch – chocolate bars on a draughty rock;
scoops of cloudless water from the peristalsis of a stream.
Mid-morning it is fresh in the umbrella of the pines.
Groundwater bubbles through the sweating,
detritus-soaked soil.It is an hour as the hawk flits,
two as the lizard bolts,
three for the lovers who clamber
up the stony meander,
arms tugging on vibrant trunks
and each other’s encouragement.
Suddenly the canopy disintegrates, suddenly
it is all angled rays, sun signals
bouncing off granite into the newly-tuned
Corsican radar in their eyes:
all mountains dancing bossa nova
round an azure painted hall.On the bald pate of the Bocca Palmente
she points down at the impenetrable
forest of their past, reminding him of
the start of their walk,
when they stepped through a gate and the foliage clothed them;
when they decided to get lost in the damp, colluding trees.
He points out to the Pleine Orientale,
reminding her of the incalculable sea,
their future atoms glimmering in the haze of
whatever salty breakers, whatever
knuckly roots, whatever narrow,
lightning-bleached ledges await them.I know a few VERY rude limericks – but I can’t post them here.
CC
I prefer the Basement Jaxx version :P
It doesn’t seem to have been edited or even proofread, which is sinful in prose writing. It reads to me like a bad attempt at virginal erotica.
Sorry but… where is the passion, where aren’t the cliches? There isn’t even a vivid scene-setting of this most traditional tryst to enjoy.
The one bit I liked was about it being ok sometimes to make beautiful women blush, but otherwise…
CC
The rhymes’ strictness went away as the piece progressed; so you should either tighten that up or abandon them altogether; or work in a looser rhyme scheme throughout.
The use of tree as personal metaphor is well-worn but powerful nonetheless, a good choice.
It reminds me of the Ents in Lord of the Rings.
CC
Well, this is extremely moving. Well done for getting it down.
Thanks
CC
William
This is a simple appeal, and it really does come off. I liked it a lot.
Thanks
CC
Well in the case of the grey squirrel that’s not entirely true, as they’re not a native UK species so they didn’t initially have any “land” we could “encroach on”…
My mate has suggested the following anti-squirrel-on-bird-feeder devices:
1. Electrify the pole, insulating only the top bit where the birds flit.
2. Get a .22 rifle.
3. Spike the bird food with red peppers, which birds don’t mind but squirrels do.CC
Angelwolf
Get a squirrel-proof feeder: http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/aw-cgi/eBayISAPI.dll?RedirectEnter&partner=35421&loc=http%3A%2F%2Fcgi.ebay.co.uk%2Fws%2FeBayISAPI.dll%3FViewItem%26item%3D7746172042
Or you can make your own, apparently by fixing two hemispherical hanging baskets together, provided that the spaces in the baskets’ mesh are smaller than a squirrel’s cross-sectional signature.
CC
A rare beauty, indeed :P
Thanks
CC
2. Collecting
Last year’s graffiti tags are mould
necrotising the cutting’s buttresses;
decaying carriages shake
outside the train care depot,
never to be allowed back in;
an ATM doesn’t pay out,
though you pound its sticky keys…This is a friendless place for collecting.
Alert, chirpy platform managers try their best:
revising the day’s delays before their shift,
polishing whistles with an employed pride,
eagle-eyed at the turnstiles for ticketless prey.A friendless place for collecting her.
But I’ve come into Southampton’s iron harbour
what? I’ve lost count how often;
reassured by the curving track,
I’ve watched from the window
the front of my train grasping for home,
the future pulling the present out of its lightless tunnel.I’ll be a friendly face collecting her.
These days, I tell myself
she bought a meal deal on the way from Winchester,
a Thai chicken wrap, a diet cola, a Grab Bag of salted crisps,
which she left unfinished,
or gave to the Big Issue Man collecting down the aisle.
