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yep :)
bottle
Tibet
nooooooooooooo we’re going to go through the same cycle of words again ](*,)
Dear Mr Trawler,
Please accept my apologies for not having replied to your last correspondence but I have been rather preoccupied. When we bumped into each other last night in the Grand Lobby of the Forum Three hotel I wasn’t sure if you recognised me but I did promise to write one last letter to tie up some loose ends so as promised, here it is.
You see, not long after your last missive I had a surprise visitor who brought to my attention the correspondence you were having with other ladies. Well I was devastated; with your smooth words and attention to my ample assets I truly thought that I was your one and only, that you would eschew all others. Just as I was drying my eyes with what I thought was a lace hanky but turned out to be a lacy thong – oh how embarrassing! – my unexpected visitor then showed me copies of the pictures that you alluded to in your last missive.
Well what can I say? I am very flattered at how you imagined me and your attention to anatomical detail was astounding, you have obviously spent many hours studying both the male and female form in some detail.
As impressed as I was with your imagination and attention to detail, I couldn’t believe that the human body could perform in such a way and said as much to my visitor who by now, having held and comforted me as I wept and listened attentively to my woes, was becoming a good friend. To my surprise he assured me that it was indeed possible and offered to show me how.
The past few days have been such a blur; not only can the human body perform in such a way but the experience, the sensations, the mutual pleasure…quite exhilarating and unlike anything I have ever experienced with any of my previous husbands. It’s also very addictive, I find that I just can’t get enough!
My dearest Mr Trawler, I have so much to thank you for, you have truly opened my eyes to the delights that the human body can offer and I am so grateful, but it is with regret that I must withdraw my application to be your cyber valentine. You see, whilst sharing these learnings I have fallen in love with my visitor who has made it all so real and I’m sure you’ll agree that any experience in the real world is far superior to the experience in the cyber world.
I am sure you won’t be too bereft at the news as it seems you have plenty of female company to choose from and I hope that you will find the same pleasure that I have.
Kindest regards,
JenP.S. Your manservant says that your lucky grey y-fronts are in the bottom drawer of the tallboy although he’s not sure why you call them lucky as they’ve never worked. Please don’t worry about the outstanding three weeks pay that you owe him – he suggests that you use it to buy the lucky lady you select as your valentine a box of Maltesers, it should stretch to that.
tumped
Oooooh had to google that!
Rutabaga…intrigued me when I found this listed as an ingredient in Branston Pickle a few years ago, never seen it anywhere else…
Romania
soda
he has appeared in commercials but is not known as an actor