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great advice..starve the babies, hope you can live with yourself
Kids think they’ve got it it rough these days – in my day we didn’t have paedophiles, we had to buy our own fu.cking sweets.
While attending a Marriage Encounter Weekend, my husband and I listened to the instructor declare, ‘it is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other.’
He addressed the men: ‘can you each name and describe your wife’s favourite flower?’
he leaned over, touched my arm gently and whispered, ‘self-raising, isn’t it?’
“gwen” has obviously decided she doesnt like living with ar.seholes and has gone to live elsewhere
well..it was a new years eve promise (which are usually made to be broken!) I was wasted..as you do…and announced to family/friends that I WOULD this year run a marathon..maybe not the full london thingy, but at least a half one! I was adamant (not adam ant of course) that i would start the new year afresh and start training immediately for the run of my life…and at that precise moment, i meant it!
The erm thing is… ive just realised that were now at the half way point of the year ALREADY!!! and to think, ive not so much as been for a brisk walk :twisted: all those good intentions went out the window, i kept putting it off saying “its winter, its too cold to run out doors in the dark and cold” …but its summer now and i still cant get my ar,se into gear!
The thing is, SOME people were not as drunk as i on new years 8) and remember the moment i announced my resolution with great delight – the swines!! i often get asked, “when is this marathon….
ARRRRRGHHHHHH
@sir Actor wrote:
@pats wrote:
snake hips errol brown lookalikey should have gone thro. pah. :evil:
WTF??
He was Hot Chocolate as was that Jock “singer”.
The footballer and the 12 year old should have gone through together.got to say i was well disappointed! i thought the scottish singer was shyte..how did he even get to the semi’s??!!
I know the footy lad dropped the ball but i thought he deserved 2nd place by far.
Overall the talent on last nights show was pretty poor considering it was the semi’s.
Best two acts went through, although i thought the 2 asian lads were better in their first audition cos we didnt know what the surprise was. Go GIN she was brill!!!! 8)
The bloke on the keyboard was a joke..did ya see his “how to play keyboard” books :lol: he said ive practiced for 5 hours a day and star wars is ready…it was shyte!! felt sorry for the bloke though cos he thought he was good :lol:
AHEM! and i quote “…A baby is a body part until its born.”
you did say it, read back a couple of pages its all there in black and white. Quite shocking isnt, even you cant quite believe it.
well said bat :lol: :lol: i cant see what all the fuss is about either, people are moaning that 40s is dead, but its because the moaners dont use it that its become that way :roll: I dont know what they expect you to do about that! :? :lol:
