Exams ! why didnt i think of these?

STUDENT WHO OBTAINED 0% ON AN EXAM
I would have given him 100%
Q1. In which battle did Napoleon die? * his last battle
Q2. Where was the Declaration of Independence signed? * at the bottom of the page
Q3. River Ravi flows in which state? * liquid
Q4. What is the main reason for divorce? * marriage
Q5. What is the main reason for failure? * exams
Q6. What can you never eat for breakfast? * Lunch & dinner
Q7. What looks like half an apple? * The other half
Q8. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? * It will simply
become wet
Q9. How can a man go eight days without sleeping ? * No problem, he sleeps at night.
Q10. How can you lift an elephant with one hand? * You will never find an elephant that
has only one hand..
Q11. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three
oranges in other hand, what would you have ?
* Very large hands
Q12. If it took eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long would it take four men to
build it?
* No time at all, the wall is already built.
Q13. How can u drop a raw egg onto a concrete floor without cracking it?
*Any way you want, concrete floors are very hard to crack.

The Meaning (and unanswered?) Questions of Life:
The main reason Santa is so jolly is that he knows where all the bad girls live.
I went to a bookstore and asked the assistant for the “Self-Help” section.
She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
What if there were no hypothetical questions?
If someone with a multiple personality disorder tries to kill himself, is it a
hostage situation?
Is there another word for synonym?
What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered
plant?
If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
If a turtle doesn’t have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
If the police arrest a mime artist, do they tell him he has the right to remain
silent?
One nice thing about egotists, they don’t talk about other people.
Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery?
How is it possible to have a civil war?
If you ate both pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?
Why is it called tourist season if we can’t shoot at them?
Why is there an expiry date on sour cream?
Can an atheist get insurance against acts of God?
If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and
apes?
..and finally, one tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor….