Rexdeus’s sloppy poems…

Yes..I know… They might be crap..but hey, I have feeling too you know..well maybe I did back then when I wrote this stuff.
They were times when I was lost in an emotional darkness confused about where i was going and why and with whom.
Love? hmmmm sometimes one can confuse lust with love and that what one feels as love, it has the same kind of painful yearning but behind the soft velvet veil was someone not wanting to commit everything at that time.
A few of these loves I met locally, others on the net.. but each time a love ended the pain was always the same.
In those melencolic days and night while I sat feeling sorry for myself I wrote a series of poems that at the time reflcted my feelings and thoughts…looking at them now it seems as if a stranger had written them and I realise how musch i have changed since then.
For the better? who knows.
Here is one about the pain of heartache and the un sucsesfull
as always sorry about the spelling..to idle to look it all up..hehe

Backward Glance

What is this painful concern?
Why this old ache,
Why does the thought of you not wane?
I am not in love no more; don’t live in the past.
No, not in love

Maybe it is my silly old pride,
The same that let you take me for a ride,
Or is it just that old fool for romance or just that
Backwards glance?
Thinking maybe there might have been a chance,
Or something I might have said,
I am not in love with that impossible dream,
No, I am not in love anymore,

Your scent lives on upon my pillow,
The ghost of your love walks beside me,
No, your long gone, but why this pain?
I am not in love. No way,

I don’t love you anymore so why does your
Ghost torment me so?
Maybe it is the places we used to go,
The friends we once shared,
Or is it the sound of the soft summer rain
Upon my heart?
Or the songs you loved on my stereo,
No…I don’t love you anymore, not at all,

But why this concern?
Be gone silly old pride, go take a ride,
Go away and hide,
Be gone fly away you ghost, be gone, blow away,
take with you the gloomy grey, let my appetite come back
to stay, release that grip upon my heart,
I am not in love with you no more, no not one bit.

Rexdeus xXx