the Hormone Hostage

THE HORMONE HOSTAGE KNOWS THAT THERE ARE DAYS IN> THE MONTH WHEN ALL A MAN HAS TO DO IS OPEN HIS MOUTH>& HE TAKES HIS LIFE INTO HIS OWN HANDS!
THIS IS A HANDY> GUIDE THAT SHOULD BE AS COMMON AS A DRIVER’S LICENSE
>IN THE WALLET OF EVERY HUSBAND, BOYFRIEND,>CO-WORKER, OR SIGNIFICANT OTHER!>>>>>>>DANGEROUS:>>SAFER:>>SAFEST:>>ULTRA SAFE:
>>>WHAT’S FOR DINNER?
>>CAN I HELP YOU WITH DINNER?
>>WHERE WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO FOR DINNER?
>>HERE, HAVE>SOME WINE
.>>>ARE YOU>WEARING THAT?
>>WOW, YOU SURE LOOK GOOD IN BROWN!
>>WOW!>LOOK AT YOU!
>>HERE, HAVE>SOME WINE.
>>>WHAT ARE YOU>SO WORKED UP ABOUT?
>>COULD WE BE OVERREACTING?
>>HERE’S MY PAYCHECK.
>>HERE, HAVE>SOME WINE.
>>>>SHOULD YOU BE EATING THAT?
>>YOU KNOW, THERE ARE A LOT OF APPLES LEFT.
>>CAN I GET YOU A PIECE OF CHOCOLATE WITH THAT?
>>>HERE, HAVE>SOME WINE.
>>>WHAT DID>YOU DO>ALL DAY?
>>I HOPE YOU DIDN’T OVER-DO IT TODAY.
>>I’VE ALWAYS LOVED YOU IN THAT ROBE!
>>HERE, HAVE>SOME MORE>WINE.

>>12 THINGS PMS STANDS FOR:
>1. PASS MY SHOTGUN
>2. PSYCHOTIC MOOD SWING
>3. PERPETUAL MUNCHING SPREE
>4. PUFFY MID-SECTION
>5. PEOPLE MAKE me SICK
>6. PROVIDE ME with SWEETS
>7. PARDON MY SOBBING
>8. PIMPLES MAY SURFACE
>9. PASS MY SWEATS
>10. PISSY MOOD SYNDROME
> 11. PACK MY STUFF
> &&& MY FAVORITE ONE
> 12. POTENTIAL MURDER SUSPECT
>>PASS THIS ON TO ALL OF YOUR HORMONAL FRIENDS & THOSE WHO MIGHT NEED A GOOD >LAUGH!!
>>…OR MEN WHO MAY NEED WARNING!!