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9 MONTHS
Two friends John and Iain, have decided to have a cheap holiday, so pack up their bikes n set off for a weekend camping. As night draws closer the weather starts to turn nasty and they decide to stop at the next house and ask for shelter.
A few miles down the road they see a sprawling country house, make their way down the drive and ring the bell. A middle aged woman opens the door and the explain their plight.
“Sorry” she says, “I’m recently widowed and if the neighbours see you two coming in and out, I wont be able to stand their gossip”
“Thats OK” says John “We can sleep in the barn, and if the weather clears, we’ll be away before dawn and no one will ever know we were here”
The woman agrees and John and Iain spend the night in the barn. Sure enough, as the day breaks they see blue skys and set off to enjoy the rest of their break.
9 months later, John appears at Iains door
“Remember when we were on holiday 9 months ago” he says “did you by any chance get up through the night?”
Iain looks a bit embarressed “yes”
“And did you by any chance go up to the house to visit our host”
Looking more nervous, Iain once again replies “yes”
“And, maybe by accident, did you use my name instead of your own while you were with her”
Cringing this time Iain mumbles yes again “Whats happened?” he asked
“She died an left me the lot” laughs John
What did you think was going to happen??? you lot have one track minds ;)
RIDDLE
What gets longer when pulled……………
Fits between your boobs…………..
Inserts neatly in a hole, and
Works best when jerked………………… ???
A SEAT BELT you pervert!!!
@pats wrote:
ye cant beat the old black n white musicals………heres my hero.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4xVx_9CbOp8
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zx8Eq0GbZ2o
i love when bbc2 and ch4 put on the ole films but ive actually started buyin the dvd;s my fav collection is Doris Day from the film young at heart i love it watch it all the time lol Im ready; Im willing im able..!!! lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w5NjYKOvADI@bat wrote:
Elton John. Apparantly the second song was Princess Diana,s favourite.
wipes a tear…. funny how someone u don’t know can make u shed a tear or 2…
Diana at happyier times
one of my favs Bowie songs@sweetass wrote:
Sorry to be a party pooper … but why do some posters feel the need to either give us pictures of themselves topless or with their tits hanging out :?: aren’t the majority of them okay to look at as it is without corrupting our innocents eyes and minds with barely concealed mammary or chest shots …..nearly brought up me vodka ffs :roll: :roll: :shock: :wink: :lol:
im sure what ever angle Star took there’s no way of hiding that 4 piece suite…!!! lol here id die fir boobs that had gravity and took a fab photo lol but id only have to post fae the knees doon lol
u think’d i could sell ole ‘ Forsty Breaches’ infact she’s goin free atpresent lol she could become an ornament in ur hoose in the corner, chain-smokin thru 40 aday fags, coughin n sputterin her lungs up…….. and even sports the Immac on chin n tash every other few days….!!! any takers no distance to far as i’ll throw in free delivery also….. !!!!
@pats wrote:
dunno bout u lot but i think boys are worse!!!my 9yr old laughed hysterically when i mentioned shoes…………….its black trainers or he aint goin back…end of. :lol: he needs complete new uniform…..polo shirts have to be white (only the poufs wear red) :roll: black trousers NOT GREY.SEE ABOVE…………and a certain sweatshirt with sleeves long enuff to stretch so he can tie it around his waist. i think i spent more on hair stylin products than clothes fgs!.and as for pe kit….thats a big no no unless i want him gettin beaten up in the locker room. plain white t shirt……….his as to ave at least a nike tick on it………..navy blue shorts….ok as long as there is a designer tab showin. and black pumps..yer avin a laff……….hed rather go barefoot. and why use a school bag wen u can cram all ye need in ye pockets.
god gimme strength!!!!!!!!!!! :evil:LMFAO PASS ME THE BOOZE lol my lad only 2 ive got this to come eh lol
lol my pals lad is startin the High school this yr his p7 dance, he had to wear designer this and that… my pal mair fool her decks him out in the top of the gear creamin in @ £300…
here my wee man no need fir products he’s got a no.1 still lol looks a rite wee thug lol with big blues eyes and the longest eyelashes than he flutters on my cheeks lol
@ugo wrote:
@abitofmary_j wrote:
@ugo wrote:
Rob who ? who is it ? Robson Green ? :? :? :? its been a long day
Robbie Williams..!!!!
I knew that ffs lmaooooo
who U lmafooooo @ eh lol i was like surely the tw@nk knows the Robster lol he certainly aint a young chappy lol
here Ugo did ya like Sid and Nancy…??
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kv-p68mgT34&mode=related&search=
@cymorill wrote:
One of my all time fave tunes, from one of my all time fave films..
cym annie lennox and dave stewart fair made crackin songs eh …… btw this aint the film thread lol theres that many u 4get where ur stickin things eh lol class song cheers…..
