[Druid]

@bat wrote:

Something else that winds me up. Iresponsible pig ignorant dog owners who let their bloody dogs shit all over the pavement outside my sons school. FFS. :evil: Theres loads of kids coming out of school and from the infants nextdoor and they all get their shoes covered in it because of these ignorant people. If you cant clear up after your pet you shouldnt have one. Which brings me switly onto horse owners!! You all know what I think about them. :evil: :evil: :evil:

Now that is hard to get off the living room carpet Bat…….!

[Druid]

Agencies……..friggin job agencies
Ok I need a job, so went into town on the bus, usual pram issues on the entrance to the bus but hey…
Got into the first agency, being a bit nervous (as you are) I went about the form filling in etc etc, nothing at the moment Mr Druid, but we’ll keep in touch, Cool.
Now then, when I went in there were two doors, swing type that met in the middle, when I went to go out there were three……….figure that out?
I came in on the one on the right so I figured go out of the one on the left…….got me so far?? logic working??
………I ended up in a display window full of nice hanging cards on wires with amazed job seekers and window gazers staring back at me……..did i feel a tw@t or what?………(best part when I went back in and out the other door NO ONE IN THE PLACE HAD NOTICED pml)
PERTEMPS BRISTOL you know who you are!!!!!

……….BIG GGGGGRRRRRRRRRR

[Druid]

@babycham wrote:

Well well Druid, what a funny thread. havent laughed as much for ages. I agree with everything here and can relate to it lol. Now i have a gripe. Why when walking along a street, do young lads SPIT. YUK. I have actually been spat at by a young lad from a group because i happened to look at them pmsl. Got into trouble for it when nice young policeman took me down police station. The crime, slapping young lad on face. I got good talking too for, wait for it, racism pmsl. Ruined my top i was wearing cos lad had been drinking but that didnt matter. Neither did him spitting at me, oh well. Thats it for now folks.

Thanks Babycham, I must admit I didn’t plan it but it appears to be growing lol

and yes i agree about the spitters, but the kids with the hoods???? I think it’s to hide all those spots and probably a replacement for something the rabbi took!

[Druid]

@constantino wrote:

:lol: druid, is that a take on sailingal’s joke, or wherever she got it, wasn’t it about a blonde :lol:

I’ll have to scroll up and read that :shock: , no I haven’t read SG’s yet

Why, thank you Buns :)

[Druid]

Ok my first go here, so bare with me…….

Ugo was driving home over the Severn Bridge at about 90mph. Wouldn’t you know a welsh copper jumped out and clocked him with radar. Ugo pulled over like a good driver does.
The welsh copper walked up to the window and said, “You know how fast you were going BOY?!?”
Ugo thought for a second and asked, “Uhhh, over 60?”
“93mph son! 93mph in a 70 area!”
“But if you already knew,” replied Ugo, “Why did you ask me?”
Ignoring Ugo, the officer continued, in his normal charming fashion, “That’s speeding and your getting points and a fine!” The copper took a good look at Ugo and said, “You don’t even look like you have a job! Why,… I’ve never seen anyone so scruffy in my entire life!”
Ugo recanted, “I’ve got a job! I have a good, well paying job!”
The copper leaned in the window, and with the smell of day old donuts on his breath, said, “What kind of a job would a bum like you have?!?”
“I’m an a**hole stretcher!!!” replied Ugo.
“What you say, BOY?!?” asked the copper.
“I’m an a**hole stretcher!!!”
Of course the copper asked, “What does an a**hole stretcher do?”
Ugo explained, ” People call me up and say they want to be stretched, so I go over there and start with a couple of fingers, then a couple more, and then one whole hand, then two. Then I pull them farther and farther apart until it’s six feet across.”
The welsh copper, absorbed with the images in his mind, let down his guard and asked, “What the hell do you do with a six foot a**hole ?”
Ugo nonchalantly commented, “You give it a radar gun and stick it at the end of the severn bridge…….!”

[Druid]

Am I a bit late in saying the ‘I’s’ have it? :lol:

[Druid]

@cas wrote:

@druid wrote:

Call me Mr Angry or what, but don’t you realise that sometimes some people live on another planet?, this was typical today….

1. Local rag got shoved through the letterbox, nothing unusual?, lazy little sod never pushes it all the way in, even though he’s been told, therefore if it rains it gets wet…….and the rolled up ‘rag’ acts as a funnel, ergo puddles indoors, also advertises the fact that no one is at home.

I solved this one Dru by putting a notice in my front door, it’s a frosted glass door and the notice reads,,,,,,,No Menu’s, Leaflets, Free Newspapers, or any other cr@p which fits into that criteria!,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,it seems to work :lol:

2. Latest trolley craze by shoppers, they are wandering down an aisle, no ‘wandering’ is the wrong word, ‘strolling dreamily’, yep thats it, so you decide to walk past them as they are so slow, whats happens? their little brain sparks into life and decides ‘Ooo I think I’ll turn around now’ and they swing the trolley in a wide arc without even thinking of looking first, when the feck did idiots start doing that? grrrr.

Theyv’e obviously never seen supermarket sweep have they :lol: (no, i dont watch it,,im really not that sad :lol: ) I know what you mean tho Dru, and when they turn round and whack you with their trolley, it’s you who shouldn’t have been there in the first place attitute gets you eh, lol

3. Following a car home last night, this guy was driving all at 10mph, so I overtook him….wrong move, he is now gesturing all manner of things at me, ‘pull in’, ‘you’ve got a bad juvanile habit’ motion, I’m thinking this guys on drugs, then the lights change, he gets out the car and starts shouting abuse and waving his arms around, what did I do take up his personal space?? Grrrr

Now this!!!! :twisted: agrees wiv Bat too on the notion of supposedly bein psychic, then again Bat, i thought you was! psychic, well sugar said so anyway, Oo(or was it a witch) hehehehe……….well round here anyway, not only are you expected to be psychic, your supposed to be able to see in the dark, the same as those who clearly can, y’know,,,,,,,the ones who drive around at night with NO BLOODY LIGHTS!!!!!!!!! :twisted: :twisted:

4. So I get to ASDA, still in one piece and park the car, nothing could go wrong right?……wrong, women is putting her shopping in the back seat of the car, not the boot the back seat, and they all do it, shoppers of all ages, they open the door and ‘BANG’ straight into your paintwork……..do they give a toss?, more often than not they never notice. Grrrr

They dont give a toss dru :lol: :wink:

Grrrr………this posting will grow just with MY rants I can promise that!!

Me and my squirrel are gonna get pissed tonight!!!!

And yes I did get ‘cheap wined’ :lol: :lol:

Thank you Cas x nice to know it ain’t just me

[Druid]

@ugo wrote:

@pats wrote:

MY requested preference had no available posts.

check out girls are two a penny PATS why not try bettering yourself next time :lol: :lol: :lol:

You wanna apply Druid mate maybe in the plumbing section too :wink:

Dont Bat & Becky carry on so about f00k all like its life & death god I wish they`d grow up :-({|=

Think yer right teach them lazy sod’s a bit of customer care eh! :wink:

[Druid]

@ugo wrote:

@druid wrote:

Going into B&Q and trying to find a member of staff, I found ’em alright, all attending some sort of training session, I asked at customer services for the store plumber,
‘They are all in a training session and cannot be disturbed’ I was told
‘ What are they being trained for?’ says I, a bit irrate and in need of advice, I was right in the middle of a job installing a new basin, water turned off tools scattered everywhere job not going too well and the parts I bought were not working etc etc

‘Customer Assistance Improvement Programme’ she says,

Grrrrrr :evil: :evil: :evil:

Its true that Druid about B&Q you wander round looking for staff & your garunteed every one of them is always in the wrong section , you ask em for something in plumbing & they say oops sorry im electrical , the plumbing guy should be knocking around somewhere ….
I`ll tell you what you wanna have a go at this for a laugh mate

http://www.jobs.diy.com/jobs/search.asp?category=ca

Its an online application form , multiple choice questions & at the end it tells you weather or not your suitable for employment within the company Its virtually impossibe I know loads who have tried & failed , It just makes you wonder though how the plonkers who work there actually got on, especially at the end where it says your personality isnt what were looking for ……..

I also think Bat should have a go at it too as reading her thoughts on it could be quite amusing :lol: :lol: :lol:

just had another go at it myself its very amusing honestly :lol: :lol: :lol:

Your Personality Profile
Print

Thank you for completing the questionnaire. You will see your scores below, along with some written feedback.Your scores are expressed in sten (standard ten) scores, which reflect the normal distribution of the personality factors throughout the general population. The average scores for the general population are scores of 5 or 6 and these scores are achieved by approximately 38% of people. Scores of 4 or 7 are achieved by a further 30%, scores of 3 and 8 by 18 %, scores of 2 and 9 by 9% and scores of 1 and 10 by approximately 5%.Although scores are described in the text as ‘high’ or ‘low’ there are no right or wrong score directions and these labels are used for purely descriptive purposes. The brief summary below gives the factors, your scores and some indication of what your scores mean.

Agreeableness
Conscientiousness
Conformity
Extroversion
Emotional Stability

Agreeableness:
Your score of 9 on the Agreeableness scale means that you are actually a very sensitive person. You are probably quite an emotional individual in the sense that you are aware of your own and other people’s feelings. You would almost certainly place the needs and feelings of your colleagues at the top of your priorities. Indeed, you would generally be seen as a caring and compassionate person who wanted to put people and their needs first. Clearly, this suggests that you would be at your best where relationships and empathy were important, but it could also mean that you sometimes find it quite difficult to deal with colleagues or customers who might be less sensitive in their manner.
Conscientiousness:
Your score of 10 on the scale of Conscientious is very high and indicates that you are likely to be a very structured and tidy person who values order and neatness. You would probably have very high personal standards and would be very good at following procedures. You would be likely to appreciate the opportunity to be methodical and detail-minded, so would probably be well suited to most jobs requiring close attention and the ability to work to a consistently high standard.Conformity:You have scored 4 on the Conformity scale. This suggests that you are, in all likelihood, a fairly unorthodox person who occasionally likes to be something of a non-conformist. You probably don’t place the same high value on social convention as many of the people who work within B&Q, and some of your colleagues might see you as too informal in your dealings with customers. You’re likely to be a fairly flexible and original thinker who would sometimes produce new and different ideas. You may well have an enquiring streak that means you are interested in many topics. When possible you probably try to introduce some form of innovation into the working environment and this could mean that you find the emphasis placed by your B&Q colleagues on following procedures was a little restrictive.
Extroversion:
Your Extroversion scale score of 7 is above average and indicates that you are likely to be a friendly and gregarious person who would settle into any new social environment quite quickly. You probably enjoy having a wide range of social relationships and would probably want a job that offered you the chance for plenty of interpersonal contact with colleagues and customers. You’re probably quite open, with a fairly persuasive way of expressing yourself. Because you’re likely to be quite convincing in your manner and well suited to roles requiring good social skills you would be likely to enjoy most jobs which required you to deal with other people. You’re probably quite a competitive person who would respond positively to most challenges. Because public recognition would matter a great deal to you, you would probably want regular acknowledgements of your achievements. Emotional Stability:
You scored 9 on the Emotional Stability scale. It suggests that you are probably quite an assured individual who is fairly optimistic and positive in your outlook. When dealing with customers or work colleagues you are probably able to express your views with a confident authority. What’s more, you are probably able to readily assert yourself when you think it’s necessary to do so. You’re probably quite ambitious and would approach your job with enthusiasm, enjoying any role that placed you in a position of responsibility. You would probably be very decisive when faced with difficulties and generally would find it easy to make your own decisions quite quickly. In all likelihood you can cope fairly well with job associated stress. Indeed, you would probably work at your best if you were slightly pressurised.

Ulp! I ferkin passed…………. :oops:

[Druid]

Going into B&Q and trying to find a member of staff, I found ’em alright, all attending some sort of training session, I asked at customer services for the store plumber,
‘They are all in a training session and cannot be disturbed’ I was told
‘ What are they being trained for?’ says I, a bit irrate and in need of advice, I was right in the middle of a job installing a new basin, water turned off tools scattered everywhere job not going too well and the parts I bought were not working etc etc

‘Customer Assistance Improvement Programme’ she says,

Grrrrrr :evil: :evil: :evil:

[Author]

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