Eva licious

Janis Joplin Kurt Cobain Jimi Hendrix a few of the 27 forever club, they all had worldwide admiration unbelievable talent, wealth but sadly tortured in there own way. when u hear ple say money fame ect dosnt buy you happyness they wernt kidding.

Women’s Problems
– MEN tal illness
– MEN strual cramps
– MEN tal breakdown
– MEN opause
– GUY necologist
– And when we have real trouble, it’s a…..HIS terectomy.
Ever notice how all of women’s problems start with men?

a rare raw inspirational unique talent shame self destruction was her muse

Q. What should you give a man who has everything?
A. A woman to show him how to work it.

Q. How are husbands like lawn mowers?
A. They’re hard to get started, they emit noxious odours, and half the time they don’t work.

Q. Why do men like smart women?
A. Opposites attract

Q How do you get a man to stop wanting se x
A marry him

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.

Perfect numbers like perfect men are very rare

What is gross stupidity 144 men in one room

a doctor asks a man for a stool sample a blood sample a semen sample and a urine sample his wife replies just give him your underwear

why…[Read more]

Man – A Chemical Analysis

Element : Man
Symbol : Ah (short for Asshole)
Quantitative : Accepted at 7 inches though some isotopes can be as short as 4 inches.
Discoverer : Eve (discovered by accident one day when she had a craving for ribs)
Occurrence : Found following duel element Wo, often in high concentration near a perfect Wo…[Read more]

Types Of Men You Might Find In The Restroom

Absent Minded: Opens his vest, pulls out his tie, and pisses in his pants.
Clever: Uses no hands, shows off by fixing tie with both hands, looks around for admiration, and sometimes ends up pissing on the floor and onto his shoes.
Cross-eyed: Looks into urinal on the left, pisses into the one in the…[Read more]

Because I’m a man, when I lock my keys in the car, I will fiddle with a coat hanger long after hypothermia has set in. Calling the AAA is not an option. I will win.

Because I’m a man, when the car isn’t running very well, I will pop the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I’m looking at. If another man shows up, one of us will say to…[Read more]

men are like roses

watch out for the pr1cks

well i found this mortifying but it made the poor guy bhind the counter at my local newsagent smile when i walked in n asked him “do u ave candy balls” i hope he realised i was asking for a sweetie and nothing else so in short he was giggling and i turned beetroot red

well that is an interesting fact my sweet, if i had known that at the time of my jc war could ave been over sooner and thousands of lives could ave been saved xxxxxxx

I dont know if this falls into this thread, but if uv read my f2 thread feeling nothing about how i recently lost my mother, and even though she left wen i was little and had no contact with her, her friends and a few relatives of hers have made me feel upset, guilty about not letting them into my life but i still feel a little overwhelmed and…[Read more]

oh no i meant me babe, in all honesty i’m a complete whackadoodle lol xx

i’m so determined to ave the final word on this thread lol xxxxxxx

no point trying to be all friendly now you ave made a powerful enemy my friend be scared b very very scared. :evil:

no i’m sorry i’m avin a bit of a moody wednesday myself which explains y i bit back i grudgingly admit you made a few good points, so i’m gonna go eat choccie n cheer myself up. u ave a good day and admit it it passed the…[Read more]

i know u ave a sense of humour masterplan i always think ur funny wen ur in jc, i was just tryin to make the point just cause i posted this dosnt mean i’m a man hating harridan,
and i can spell i just cant type lol. anyhoos it’s always good to ave a wednesday barney innit love to u masterplan and dubbs thanks for playing peacemaker lol…[Read more]

at the same time i posted this thread i also posted husband shop thread, which was a slight dig at woman kind both i put up because i thought they were funny i dont use the boards to have a dig at men but if we c ant laugh at men woman ect well im just glad i can laugh at most things as long as they are not too offensive shows we ave a…[Read more]

masterplan i’m not looking to argue with u either, i dont want anything i put up on the boards to hurt or offend anyone i do not think that is what the boards are here for. but if u look at the boards some of it is aimed at us woman too it is a joke thread, i just saw it n thought it was funny if i saw a bit about advice about fathers to sons…[Read more]

‘ took the post down, didnt want any male feelings hurt lol

btw ta for the spell check, but i copy n pasted it so complain to whoever originally posted it

sorry did try n take it down, but it just keeps popping straight back up, my intention was never to hurt any male pride i just saw it n thought it was funny.

. “Two souls with but a single thought, two hearts that beat as one.”
John Keats

I personally dont hear Marvin Gaye wen Geoff enters JC Cherrie, but i do hear Barry White.

Love and the best of luck to the pair of you. xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

forget love i’d rather ave chocolate

immunity