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@camel_blue wrote:
By the time the Bolton Blonde Bomber and ThinNoDiceNoIce, got back to the Real World of JC, they were divorced. The Bomber had pushed Thin over the edge by correcting his grammar and whipping his backside once too often.
“Right that’s it, I am not spending another minute with you, you’re a moody moocow and I am off.” Thin spun around three times and muttered “I divorce thee, I divorce thee, I divorce thee,” and legged it to the JC pub, to catch up with his bro’s HGV1 and Woodie.
Bolton Blonde Bomber, stomped back to the Real World of JC nativity play, packed up her note pad, pencil, tin hat and handed in her notice to Helen of France and Penny. The bomber was off to start a new career as a glamour model and was having her assets increased. The Bomber was having her op on the day of the Nativity play. “There is no way I can possibly give birth and get new boobs at the same time besides, I divorced ThinNoDiceNoIce, I am not having a fatherless child and Playboy pay more than you lot.” Helen of France and Penny had no option but to accept Bombers resignation.
Alkiarse, eves dropping, thought it was Christmas day already, just when he thought his Bolton Beast couldn’t get any more wanton, his floozy was now going to have a pair of boobs that would put a dairy herd to shame. He stepped towards the object of his desire, with his leaf blower in hand.
“Get away from me you dirty little creature.” Bomber shoved him so hard Alkiarse, fell on his leaf blower and it shot straight up his bottom.
The three Wisemen were being entertained by the Angels when ThinNoDiceNoIce caught up with them.
Tinks, Angelturnedtodust, Maxie, FizzieLizzie, looby, losty, non-welsh, Jadey, nice-fem, Catlady and daisydot were all dressed up in their Angel costumes which, with the exception of Maxie and Angelturnedtodust, all looked suspiciously like Bridal wear. Catlady had managed to unravel her knitted monstrosity and was left with a bobble hat and her flashing Santa knickers and bra.
Jadey was singing the intro to the Supremes hit
“Stop! In the name of love before you break my heart”. All the Angels raised their hands in a stopping motion and then did a twirl.
Jadey wobbled her lady bits at Woodie, who was still in his Turkey costume. HGV1 slapped him on the back and Woodie gobbled a bit.
Nonwelshfem grabbed the microphone and looked straight at ThinNoDiceNoIce, with pure malice.
“Tinny, Thiny
I’m aware of where you go
Each time you leave JC
We watch you walk down the street
We know about the sluts you’ll meet
But this time before you run to them
Leaving the sheep to bleat
(Think it over) After they’ve been good to you ?
(Think it over) After they’ve reported you”The Angels clapped and twirled again.
Miss Rose manhandled the microphone from Nonwelshfem before she could make it to the chorus and handed it to Maxie and Tinks who sang together. Thinking that Thin might be worth a shot, they both made eye contact with him, whilst he supped his pint of John smiths. “King hell” he said to HGV1, “I only came here for a quiet pint, after being married to Bolton Bomber, I’m sticking to me lappy.”
I’ve known of your
Your secluded nights
I’ve nearly had you
Maybe once or twice
But is the donkey’s sweet expression
Worth more than my love and affection ?Tinks and Maxie were starting to drool down the front of their dresses so Miss Rose, jumped in once again and handed the microphone to Angelturnedtodust. Just as FatishNeil was contemplating getting a fifth pint of vodka, he was stopped from moving by Angelturnedtodust, landing on his lap, complete with real life working fish tank built into the bodice of her dress.
“Stop! In the name of love
before you break my heart
Stop! In the name of love
before you break my heart
Think it over
Think it over”FatishNeil there and then, made up his mind to join AA the very next day.
Miss Rose couldn’t take any more stress and stuck all the angels in her tinsel, glittered gimp masks complete with antlers and marched them out of the Real World of JC pub.
By the time the Angels arrived back at the nativity play, Alkiarse, still attached to his leaf blower, was flying around the rafters like a helium balloon. Helen of France and Penny had just finished painting their poster.
“VACANCY NEW VIRGIN WANTED FOR THINNODICENOICE – QUICKLY”
Watching the Angels read the poster, Miss Rose had never been more grateful for the gimp masks. Suddenly the hair on the back of her neck shot up, there was a strange braying noise coming from behind them.
The angels all looked behind them but being unable to scream, silently shot off in all different directions.
Miss Rose, was left alone, face to face with a braying furious donkey. Its eyes were flashing red and green, a sign warning of danger was strapped to its back and what looked like a boiled bunny was dangling from its mouth……………….
:shock: :shock: :twisted:
Pmsl well done its brill =D> =D>
=D> Well done made me laugh :lol: cheers Camel
@A.Groanup wrote:
Ahh you thought it was a reference to your post Welsh fem?
You must think the cap fits?
Maybe?Sorry i dont wear caps :lol:
@A.Groanup wrote:
@Welsh fem 1 wrote:
@A.Groanup wrote:
Pot, Kettle ?
No its not pot kettle at all!
Pardon? and how would you know?
Sorry ive not got a garden :wink:
@A.Groanup wrote:
Pot, Kettle ?
No its not pot kettle at all!
Would like to ask a question ……………………Why are you a internet troll thin :?:
@rubyred wrote:
oh Mrs t… ( sighs) .. people are not being Greedy. They entered this contract of agreement,and had money taken off thir personal wages every week. So that in their old age, they would not have to scrimp. NOW the govt comes along and tells them its not worth the papers its printed on. And how we are skint.
Now look at bankers bonuses etc.Its the banks that are crippling this country. Plus the fact there is billions spent on wars that have sweet F.A to do with us.
People HAVE to stand up and be counted NOW, as next thing it will be ..” oh we are halving your wages, that ok?”..Yesterday was a show of unity against this kind of thing ever happening again. as the song says.
If we tolerate this, then our children will be next.
Well said Ruby =D>
@gill_cambs wrote:
Rules that real men should aspire to:
1. Always treat your woman like a lady.
2. Respect her as a person.
3. Be caring and affectionate.
4. Remember special days.
5. Never take her for granted.
6. Don’t lie (you will always be found it).
7. Learn to apologise.
8. Tell her you love her (and often).
9 Don’t assume that buying dinner equals foreplay.
10. If you are going to break up with her then tell her, don’t act like a jerk until
she does it for you.All the above will probably come naturally to real men.
Other members of the male species will struggle with the above concept so should therefore stay single and stop inflicting misery on us poor girlies.
:lol: :wink:
=D> :)
@thin ice wrote:
@Welsh fem 1 wrote:
PMSL….. just left chat and thin just put him self right in it, lets hope now ppl will see the lying rat he is, he is deffo not a real man :evil:
lets be honest youve had enough so ill accept your judgement 8)
Tfft you know when ur defeated truth at last!!!
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