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    Alas not one of my own. I can just about tell the ‘What do you call a man with a spade in his head?’ joke without ruining the punch line or getting things muddled  :scratch:

     

    A frog goes into a bank and approaches the teller. He can see from her nameplate that her name is Patricia Whack.

    “Miss Whack, I’d like to get a $10000 loan to take a holiday.”

    Patty looks at the frog in disbelief and asks his name. The frog says his name is Kermit Jagger, his dad is Mick Jagger, and that it’s OK, he knows the bank manager. Patty explains that he will need to secure the loan with some collateral.

    The frog says, “Sure. I have this,” and produces a tiny porcelain elephant, about half an inch tall – bright pink and perfectly formed.

    Very confused, Patty explains that she’ll have to consult with the bank manager and disappears into a back office. She finds the manager and says, “There’s a frog called Kermit Jagger out there who claims to know you and wants to borrow $10000, and he wants to use this as collateral.”

    She holds up the tiny pink elephant.

    “I mean, what in the world is this?”

    The bank manager looks back at her and says, “It’s a knick-knack, Patty Whack, give the frog a loan. His old man’s a Rolling Stone.”

     

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