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  • #517423

    Dear Mr Trawler

    I realise that your thread pour chercher l’amour is in danger of becoming a conduit pour les affaires de notre amicale, but I by way of an update, I would like to express the gratitude of the club both collectively and individually for the sterling efforts of Ms SimplySu and Miss MoneyPenny.

    They have conducted themselves in their duties with enthusiasm and rigour. I would never have imagined that our fraternity – including some of our older and less upstanding members – would take such an interest in our previously-neglected literary section.

    Just the other day a normally-silent fellow called out “Ah! My America! My New Found Land”. At first it was hard to see where the sound had originated, but after Miss MoneyPenny’s fine form was seen leaving a particularly dark corner, the chap in question could be seen beaming and nursing a large, old anthology of the Metaphysical Poets in his lap. Such enthusiasm for the written word had been previously hidden.

    Ms SimplySu has, quite simply, not ceased in her activity since arriving and whether it is the speed of her work or some innate rhythm, her movements have had a near-hypnotic effect on the members who, while maintaining a discreet distance, have increased their use of the Lounge to the extent that even in the cold weather, we have reduced our consumption of logs for the fire due in no small part to the energy stirred by her movements which have given a whole new meaning to the verb ‘sway’.

    How she manages to divide her time between our library and her services at your place I really don’t know, but she, and Miss MoneyPenny have earned grateful admiration from us all.

    Yours Sincerely

    W[/i]

    #517424

    @wordsworth60 wrote:

    Dear Mr Trawler

    I realise that your thread pour chercher l’amour is in danger of becoming a conduit pour les affaires de notre amicale, but I by way of an update, I would like to express the gratitude of the club both collectively and individually for the sterling efforts of Ms SimplySu and Miss MoneyPenny.

    They have conducted themselves in their duties with enthusiasm and rigour. I would never have imagined that our fraternity – including some of our older and less upstanding members – would take such an interest in our previously-neglected literary section.

    Just the other day a normally-silent fellow called out “Ah! My America! My New Found Land”. At first it was hard to see where the sound had originated, but after Miss MoneyPenny’s fine form was seen leaving a particularly dark corner, the chap in question could be seen beaming and nursing a large, old anthology of the Metaphysical Poets in his lap. Such enthusiasm for the written word had been previously hidden.

    Ms SimplySu has, quite simply, not ceased in her activity since arriving and whether it is the speed of her work or some innate rhythm, her movements have had a near-hypnotic effect on the members who, while maintaining a discreet distance, have increased their use of the Lounge to the extent that even in the cold weather, we have reduced our consumption of logs for the fire due in no small part to the energy stirred by her movements which have given a whole new meaning to the verb ‘sway’.

    How she manages to divide her time between our library and her services at your place I really don’t know, but she, and Miss MoneyPenny have earned grateful admiration from us all.

    Yours Sincerely

    W[/i]

    now I am lost – words of more than one ‘sylabauble’ are more than I can cope with

    ambles off to poke holes in a net

    #517425

    anc

    but, but Mr W, Ms MP has innate rhythm too! I should know, I taught them! :wink: Or was it the other way around?! :lol:

    #517426

    @wordsworth60 wrote:

    Dear Mr Trawler

    I realise that your thread pour chercher l’amour is in danger of becoming a conduit pour les affaires de notre amicale, but I by way of an update, I would like to express the gratitude of the club both collectively and individually for the sterling efforts of Ms SimplySu and Miss MoneyPenny.

    They have conducted themselves in their duties with enthusiasm and rigour. I would never have imagined that our fraternity – including some of our older and less upstanding members – would take such an interest in our previously-neglected literary section.

    Just the other day a normally-silent fellow called out “Ah! My America! My New Found Land”. At first it was hard to see where the sound had originated, but after Miss MoneyPenny’s fine form was seen leaving a particularly dark corner, the chap in question could be seen beaming and nursing a large, old anthology of the Metaphysical Poets in his lap. Such enthusiasm for the written word had been previously hidden.

    Ms SimplySu has, quite simply, not ceased in her activity since arriving and whether it is the speed of her work or some innate rhythm, her movements have had a near-hypnotic effect on the members who, while maintaining a discreet distance, have increased their use of the Lounge to the extent that even in the cold weather, we have reduced our consumption of logs for the fire due in no small part to the energy stirred by her movements which have given a whole new meaning to the verb ‘sway’.

    How she manages to divide her time between our library and her services at your place I really don’t know, but she, and Miss MoneyPenny have earned grateful admiration from us all.

    Yours Sincerely

    W[/i]

    So funny… I look forward to the ongoing letter saga…… you are quite right words…. fine specimens of women and so obliging :D

    #517427

    @anc wrote:

    but, but Mr W, Ms MP has innate rhythm too! I should know, I taught them! :wink: Or was it the other way around?! :lol:

    Dear Ms anc,

    Thank you for filling in some of the gaps in my testimonial.

    I had aimed to give individual examples to reassure Mr Trawler of their services above and beyond the call of duty. Of course there have been other examples of their shared abilities which, whether instructed or innate, provide ample evidence of a source of the highest quality.

    A few of the more inquisitive fellows have wondered where Ms SimplySu and Miss MoneyPenny gained their skills and your message should help to subdue some of the more exotic flights of fantasy.

    Yours sincerely

    W

    #517428

    anc

    @wordsworth60 wrote:

    @anc wrote:

    but, but Mr W, Ms MP has innate rhythm too! I should know, I taught them! :wink: Or was it the other way around?! :lol:

    Dear Ms anc,

    Thank you for filling in some of the gaps in my testimonial.

    I had aimed to give individual examples to reassure Mr Trawler of their services above and beyond the call of duty. Of course there have been other examples of their shared abilities which, whether instructed or innate, provide ample evidence of a source of the highest quality.

    A few of the more inquisitive fellows have wondered where Ms SimplySu and Miss MoneyPenny gained their skills and your message should help to subdue some of the more exotic flights of fantasy.

    Yours sincerely

    W

    Dear Mr W

    You have got all ya Ms/Miss/Mrs muddled up, or is that intentional as well, as you just have to be joking about anybody from jc having exotic flights of fantasy!! :lol:

    #517429

    @wordsworth60 wrote:

    Dear Mr Trawler

    I realise that your thread pour chercher l’amour is in danger of becoming a conduit pour les affaires de notre amicale, but I by way of an update, I would like to express the gratitude of the club both collectively and individually for the sterling efforts of Ms SimplySu and Miss MoneyPenny.

    They have conducted themselves in their duties with enthusiasm and rigour. I would never have imagined that our fraternity – including some of our older and less upstanding members – would take such an interest in our previously-neglected literary section.

    Just the other day a normally-silent fellow called out “Ah! My America! My New Found Land”. At first it was hard to see where the sound had originated, but after Miss MoneyPenny’s fine form was seen leaving a particularly dark corner, the chap in question could be seen beaming and nursing a large, old anthology of the Metaphysical Poets in his lap. Such enthusiasm for the written word had been previously hidden.

    Ms SimplySu has, quite simply, not ceased in her activity since arriving and whether it is the speed of her work or some innate rhythm, her movements have had a near-hypnotic effect on the members who, while maintaining a discreet distance, have increased their use of the Lounge to the extent that even in the cold weather, we have reduced our consumption of logs for the fire due in no small part to the energy stirred by her movements which have given a whole new meaning to the verb ‘sway’.

    How she manages to divide her time between our library and her services at your place I really don’t know, but she, and Miss MoneyPenny have earned grateful admiration from us all.

    Yours Sincerely

    W[/i]

    Dear Grandmaster Words,

    It is an incontestable truth that one of life’s pleasures is the receipt of your letters – and this occasion is no exception to the rule.

    It is always rewarding to be presented with gracious and favourable comments about those with whom one must acknowledge a certain fiduciary obligation. The Trawler lineage has for the most part been one of nothing more than forlorn events of mistake begat mistake, so it is decidedly encouraging to identify that my eagerness to embrace Mmes MoneyPenny and SimplySu into the bosom of my humble household has proved to be amongst my better decisions.

    I am also perplexed at their ability to administrate to my disorderly needs whilst finding the requisite time to accommodate the demands of the fraternity, but needless to say hitherto they have exemplified their sex with admirable aplomb. Recent events – of which details shall be reserved for a colourful retelling in the Gentlemen’s Club Smoking Room – have demonstrated that the verve and ingenuity of a young lady is usually unleashed should the circumstances be favourable. Perhaps I can suggest by way of caution that our older peers consider cordial consultations with their doctors prior to extended encounters with these ladies.

    Miss MoneyPenny’s enthusiastic undertaking of the domestic drudgery that always seemed insurmountable has been beyond reproach. However, if may take this opportunity to confide bemusement about one of her more unusual practices, perhaps you can bring to bear your considerable experience with the gentle sex. I trust your counsel in these matters remains unblemished despite the Lady Jen Jen question that is furnishing the chattering classes with gossip?

    She has deemed the twilight hours to be conducive to the performance of several of her tasks. On occasion where my resolution has succumbed to the late-evening vicissitudes of my stomach, I have found her in the kitchen, supine in position with a winsome come hither expression. Timorous in nature, I have resolved that my best course of action is to gingerly step over her, err.., let’s say delights for the sake of polite dialogue, averting my eyes lest my hunger can no longer be satisfied by a handful of Carr’s Water Biscuits.

    Miss SimplySu’s administrative skills are second to none. She has surpassed herself with the archiving of the Trawler library and self-assuredly addressed problems beyond the call of duty. For example, she singlehandedly arranged the funeral of my manservant, incidentally please extend my gratitude to our brothers for their gracious attendance.

    You will of course understand that I was keen to find a suitable replacement at the earliest convenience, but she assuredly stated that she could assume his duties without deleterious effect on her contractual obligations. Well, dear sir, I can blissfully inform you that the woman is without question the lady of the hour. Never before I have I been assisted with the enrobing of my smoking jacket and found my whole body to be actually smoking.

    Miss SimplySu has also proven invaluable with the assessment of the Valentine’s applications but more of that later.

    Admirably yours,

    Rusty Trawler

    #517430
    #517431

    Dear Mr Trawler,

    I fear some sabotage, that photograph is most definitely not of me. I am blonde with ample assets, not brunette with nothing worth mentioning, and I wouldn’t be seen dead in an orange cardigan on a yellow beadspread.

    Are you sure that Ms Su “Praying Mantis” Simply is as trustworthy as you think? I’m sure that a man of your stature would have carried out checks into her background and not been swayed by the uniform. If not, might I suggest you appoint a bodyguard and food taster as quickly as possibly and DO NOT, under any circumstances, allow her to lure you behind the bookcases with breathless exclamations of having found something exotically beautiful that she wants to share with you and you only.

    Please be careful my dear friend.

    J xx

    #517432

    @anc wrote:

    . . . . .

    Dear Mr W

    You have got all ya Ms/Miss/Mrs muddled up, or is that intentional as well, as you just have to be joking about anybody from jc having exotic flights of fantasy!! :lol:

    Dear Ms anc,

    I am most grateful to you for sharing your concerns. Grammatical precision is essential in maintaining a credible facade for an institution such as ours. Please pardon me any presumption in explaining my conventions.

    Where a woman’s status is indicated, courtesy presses me to use the title that she used of herself – as with Miss MoneyPenny, Where status is not indicated, as with yourself and Ms SimplySu, the formal title Ms has acquired acceptability over the past few decades.

    I would only divert from this if I became aware of some gross inaccuracy, such as the misappropriation of a noble or professional title. I believe some linguistic inelegance to be tolerable under the circumstances.

    If you prefer that I address you with another title I will comply, I have received no such request from Ms SimplySu.

    On the subject of members of the JC Gentlemen’s Club having exotic flights of fantasy, I can only put it thus: you really had to be there!

    Yours Sincerely

    W

Viewing 10 posts - 111 through 120 (of 155 total)

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