The Worst Off Person in JC?

seeeee dizzy :lol:
i knew i was worse off person,
im feckin invisible innit :shock:

lol dizzy

“whips pete then iggys him” lol

he enjoys that too much ffs lolol

No-one can be worse off than me!

I have a really bad cold, and it’s making me cough a lot, and when I do my chest hurts bad. One nostril is badly blocked-up, and every few hours when it clears, the other one gets blocked-up, it’s like they’re taking turns at being blocked-up.

I’ve got a curvature of my big toe nail, and the side of it is digging into my toe-flesh, it’s all red and sore. When I was walking the dog in the park, I found a football, and I kicked it so my dog could chase it, and it hurt like f..k cos I forgot about how tender my sore toe was.

I can’t get a shirt to fit me either, on account of me having very short arms. I know some people have a problem with their arms being very long, but they don’t suffer the way short-armed people suffer, at least long-armed people can reach things on high shelves.

My car is making my life a misery. A few months ago the timing belt snapped. It cost me almost a grand to get it fixed. I’d only had the car back a few days when another car ran into the back of it. It was awful trying to tell the insurance company how it happened, because there was no-one in either car, they were both parked.

My car ignition key broke in the ignition several nights ago, and it cost me £65.00 to get it fixed. My car hates me. The car ciggarette lighter has broken too.

I haven’t been stung by a bee or a wasp, but a long time ago a wasp did sting me, on the eye-lid. I’m unlucky that way, with animals and insects. I’ve never met anyone else who was ever bitten on the stomach by a horse the way I once was. I thought it was bad enough when my pet ferret bit me on the lip when I was a kid, but I came to realise that God must intend me to suffer these things for a reason, like when my mate’s border collie bit me on the scrotum. We were playing football at the time, and the dog liked chasing the ball. I think it just got excited when it bit me. I must admit though, I was quite excited myself when I rushed to hospital clutching my groin, but in a different way.

My windows are filthy cos the window cleaner hasn’t been for months. How can he expect me to be able to see through them when they’re so dirty?

My worktops have got brown sauce marks all over them, now I’m gonna have to clean them off, which will be quite hard work because of all the sugar that’s stuck in the sauce marks. It easy for some people to say……” But Peco! You should clean the mess off when you make it”. I don’t accept that, cos I make my tea and snacks when the TV adverts are on and I’ve barely got time as it is to rush back into the living room when the film comes back on. I can’t be expected to do everything.

I ruined one of my T shirts the other day as well, when I was ironing it. The iron was too hot, and melted the label, which was made of some synthetic blue material, then all the blue gungie stuff went on to my T shirt, right at the bottom of the V neck bit where everyone would see it. I even had to clean the iron when I was finished. I didn’t even have a Brillo Pad either, I had to use a bit of emery paper to rub the blue gungie stuff off, now the nice shiny sole plate of my iron is all rough and scratchy and I can’t see my face in it anymore. Not that I want to see my face, because I’m so ugly.

I hereby claim entitlement to any prize that might be awarded for being the worst off person on JC.

Nor me 8) :D :D