pikey

I don’t want to be even a bit forgiven. I’ve been very naughty and I deserve punishment. Especially my liver. That’s been the naughtiest.

What is it with the mugshots just recently? There’s Ms Gooners I keep trying to complain about and now Ms Rainbowbright has put one up of herself in a suicide hanging bid pose. Such beautiful girls usually.

You lot should try hoovering.

Touch. Long time. Why have you still got that picture up?

Surströmming to you too.

Who are these people popping in to say how rubbish it is and how much better they are because they don’t post all the time? Name names, Ms Gooner. I’ll shun them. Except Catz. I’m not shunning Catz. Catz is one of the unshunnables.

Iceland have just about called the receivers in. Even their leader has all but admitted they are sunk. They’re headed back to their fish pickling middle ages and a billion squid is going to make no difference at all. Now, if you’re a creditor to a liquidising concern, you don’t send that concern back the stuff you hold of theirs on the off-chance…[Read more]

Good God. Fancy taking the Brown as your template. The man is obviously a money-fevered cretin. There can be no other explanation. I’d shun him and his works, if I were you. What’s with that new photo of yours? I like the other ones better. Anyroadup:

The notion was to cut a crude V into the sprawl of the city, to vandalise dormant energies by an…[Read more]

Boyd’s a first class wanker. He should be shunned for what he’s done.

Norway are a pretty tidy side and Scotland were very unlucky, I thought. There’s plenty more points to be had and I think both sides will be in for a runners up spot witha couple of games to go.

You should find a copy a read it, Ms Gooner. If you stick with it, it will cure you of Dan Brown forever.

That was when I saw the Pendulum.
The sphere, hanging from a long wire set into the ceiling of the choir, swayed back and forth with isochronal majesty.
I knew – but anyone could have sensed it in the magic of that serene breathing – that the period was governed by the square root of the length of the wire and by π, that number which, however irr…[Read more]

We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold. I remember saying something like “I feel a bit lightheaded; maybe you should drive…” And suddenly there was a terrible roar all around us and the sky was full of what looked like huge bats, all swooping and screeching and diving around the car, which…[Read more]

Who did it remind you of? Who is this evil person you’ve met? Is it Floella Benjamin?

Further to my last post:

Twaddle, rubbish, and gossip is what people want, not action.. . . The secret of life is to chatter freely about all one wishes to do and how one is always being prevented—and then do nothing.

Soren Kierkegaard

Pepper’s one was like an mid-period Tony Hart.

Where did you say you were, Kent? Leeds or Sheffield or somewhere revolting like that? Have you got a hospital booked somewhere more civilised so it’s not stained with the shame of being born there? Really, you want to get up as far as York or Harrogate or, even better, head over the border into Derbyshire. The baby will thank you for it when it’s older.

I’m going to shun him.

Bin Laden is a Ram. He was at the West Ham game last year.

Five great poems, I would say. The authors are like the lyrical equivalents of Friedrich, Fuseli, Géricault and Lowry.

I agree with Esmeralda. Self-righteous ex-smokers, sanctimonious ex-drug takers of all sorts, in fact, make me want to throw up on their shoes. Spoilsport quitters.