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oh here we go get this one yeh? apparently not neccesarily conspiratists more like bible bashers reckon yup its him again(the devil) they are referring to the forest fires raging in france spain portugal etc i heard well overheard at the sally army today two proper sally an hes a fuckinn stalwarts nb these arent like young,shes like a willowy grey haired stuck up bitch,and hes like oh i dunno somebody from a 50s film whos still hanging on for his final ever shag,they are having an illicit affair according to us lot when i say us lot i mean me and my mates women just as much as men if not more we dont go to prayers and shit we are at the back of the building getting free grub then its all outside for a few cans few joints before the karaoke starts,,,,,so anyway i walked thru the wrong door today i wasnt thinking must be the heat and i overheard this dispute i knew it was them two .
he said”you know its the devils work you simple bitch all these fires hes a pyromaniac
she said”oh youd know all about the devil wouldnt you,you fat cheating married bastard” anywayi found the door i wanted and told everybody the news..so i got treated like royalty for about half an hour i even got an anonymous request for me to sing i love you more than i can say. so i got up on stage and said tothe dj”wtf has asked me to do this”? he said “shut it just sing”shes obviously a fan”
so i sang my heart out people were astounded at my sad angelic rendition,one auld git mabel threw her knickers at me,another woman fainted but all the while as the crowd were shouting encore,i saw a familiar face at the back snorting coke and sniggering,oh ffs its her danielle all that singing for nothing to a crackhead,anyway i wont tell you what i said to her later i put that on save,but but but but wether that fat cheating adulterer sally army bloke is a “wrong un”
has he got a point is it the devils handiwork?
if you read it properly i wasnt calling you that name i was calling it kiwi.
i love you linda but dont start coming on about your first birthday for 7 years bollocks,now let me tell you something these guys you go into pm ukc chat with lets start with admin elwood bluz total dick just cos hes watched the blues brothers and oh the best one poco loco any jcer who knows their salt know its anitagoforadump why you having a go at me im not the dickhead they are?
i know the ukc admin are reading this but they havent got the balls to reply i have a lot of friends in there they tell me everything,so im not telling you what to do but i dont want you posting in there anymore cos we will fall out! and that goes for any other jcer whos defected you know you dont like ukc really so come back apart from kiwi you sheep shagging kunt.
i was talking to an auld mate of mine last night on the phone hes called jeff lynne hes in a band or summat you might have heard of him? anyway hes got the same problem as me he keeps gettin kicked for trespassin
heres what he said
jeff”maybe they dont really think its me”
me”to well who are you exactly are you anyway”?
him “cheeky bastard”
so i said “look mate secret is to choosing a user name which is funny or wow thats clever invigorating they put a lot of effort into that like etc alf hucker henry the horse,miss understanding mr pot noodle ,basildon bond,cool andy warhol,mcfc for life yanno use your brain man”
then he says to me”yeh but i cant even log into jc,altho i can read the boards so i spotted you there spouting out yer usual shoites and i was wondering who she was that you talk to?
me”who”
he said “the one who seems to have a lot to say for herself,altho i find her an interesting chick is it linda.or summmat”?
me “oh her yeh” do you want me to pass on a message?
he said “yeh i want to try and write a song about her but you need to throw me a few snippets about her so will you ask her ok i realise that her days of going to a go go is an utter no no but ask her everything that makes her happy everything that makes her glad,the secrets that she hides just ask her everything give me something to work on
me”er yeh ok see what i can do for you now fuck off im watching naked attraction
eh get you linda 83 yrs old and youve still got men writing songs about you,ycmiu you auld bint x
anyway moving on yep im still banned from ukc not that im bothered i dont give a fuck i could easily get back in if i want to but why? they just talk nonsense all i want to know is….oh ok ive been banned down the years for this and that,mostly unfounded allegations but hey ho but what my tiny brain cant conceive or grasp the concept is trespassin means to me like being somewhere you shouldnt be yunno nicking lead of a but not chat sites ffschurch roof,stealing flowers from graveyards cos youve got no stock left for your market stall tomorrow etc but not chat sites ffs id e mail or pm a mod to explain it no point tho i probably get some window licking admin its just a word /excuse we made up cos we dont like you yeh theyre right ycmiu
dickheads.
lovely innit i have one or 2 every morning before i go out it gets my head in gear.
Glad u not on road. The traffic across the way has been high. The road lol so many incidents..glad not in one of those. Loving it on opposite side however. But tired of all the b.s.
Have to run some errands..have not used a bus in years. No hitchhikers allowed on our highways. And i dont have a horse. Thank god my legs not sore for a week..i can still walk.
well its a good job youve never had sex with me cos you wouldnt be able to walk for a month sugar boots.
Somer. Hi hope u having grand time x
As I have always considered our frienship fine, still do. Let me educate u on a female perspective. Ask the Mrs? See if i’m not right. X
You have one ship on waters..other a pirate ship who knows how to sail the seas very well. After a long while the pirate no longer wants the ship held interest in and finds another ship in sea which holds pirates interest. Soooo. Not sending any flags up, or message s.o.s. the pirate sinks ship dead in water.
Not caring what the ship held in its cargo sailed away and pursuit for another ship. Now the other ship did not plan the pirates interest so it seemed, however the 2 pirates now sail sea together, mocking and making fun of the sunk ship.
So cargo below now settled in sea of the sunk ship. So you call that 2 ships in the night? No 1 ship sunk and other sails the high blue seas till it decides to sink that ship and go after another.
im still undecided if this post is sending cryptic messages or just plain morbid?
fck off soms you dick stop trashing threads.
its weird innit when youre a bit stoned you read words differently i thought i saw linda say jol the pirate yunno cos of my name having a “dig” at mebut she wasnt she said the dreaded lol,,,,still think she was having a “pop” at me shes a smooth operator that one or is she?
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oh sunita devs ex lol now that is a gargantuan beak i like ravi shes fit as a butchers dog lives near me as well but ive gone off her a bit cos shes shacked up with a toy boy and so is carol from bbc weather jammy bastards some guys get all the luck and what do i get? some mad fat crackhead.
